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Hey im in my 30s was diagnosed last year and iim still at a lost ive come to accept it but family say im being over the top. Has any one else struggled with this and how do they cope.i do switch off but can be alot at times thankyou.and hello :slight_smile:

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Hi there :grinning_face_with_smiling_eyes:I’m not sure that I fully understand your question . Are you asking generally about the struggles ( that all of us face) in coming to terms with a diagnosis of MS or are you asking about the reactions of friends and family?

Coming to terms with the diagnosis took me a long time ( best part of a year I think). There is a lot to ā€˜process’ especially deep fears about the future and a sort of grieving process for the loss of the future you probably took for granted/ assumed you would have before MS. For a while I never stopped thinking about how I would soon be in a wheelchair and I told my then girlfriend that I would absolutely understand it if she wanted to end our relationship and would feel no resentment at all. I’m pleased to say that around 19 years later I’m not in a wheelchair and my then girlfriend is now my wife of 11 years!

In terms of friends and family , I didn’t tell my sisters and parents for years and when I did I was quite matter of fact about it. Same with friends and work

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Hi, it’s hard enough to get to grips with MS when you are the one diagnosed. Unless your family goes through something similar they will not really understand/appreciate what you are going through. Some of the MS booklets on explaining MS can be really helpful for explaining what it is and how it affects people.

As to switching off, I meditate (have done for years), get out in the garden, or get comfy with a blanket, the cat, a good book and some decent background music. My MS butts in from time to time but it doesn’t take over so much.

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Hi thankyou for replys and im starting to understand the family part thankyou and im also starting mediation again it is very peacefull and i do gardening when i can thankyou for the insight and advice :slight_smile:

I think family can have all sorts of odd reactions. Sometimes they don’t want to confront it themselves, so they ā€œdecideā€ that you have invented or exaggerated the situation. So people may prefer to pretend it isn’t happening or play it down. Sometimes people do this in a genuine, if misguided, attempt to make you feel better.

It can be a bit isolating. Your MS may not be very ā€œvisibleā€ to people and people may find it hard to put themselves in your shoes. At least you can always come to this forum and be with other people in the same boat!

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