Just realised I've forgotten what it feels like to be 'normal'

Hi all,

Got up this morning and realised I really have forgotten what its like to feel ‘normal’. Normal meaning being able to jump out of bed pain free full of energy and looking forward to how much I could cram into one day. Now my handbag is full of ‘just in case’ painkillers etc instead of girly things,my breakfast is a selection of delicious medication, my underwear drawer is full of stuff my mother would have been proud to wear and my social diary is packed full…of hospital, doctor and physio appointments!!

And I wonder why I’ve lost that wow factor?!

Seriously though, it makes me appreciate the fact that unlike many, I have experienced many years of feeling ‘normal’. At least I know what it does feel like…

Take care all

Suex

Hi Sue,

I know what you mean. Although I don’t consider myself “seriously” affected - certainly in comparison with many here - it’s still years since I got out of bed feeling fine, and nothing hurting, and I can’t really remember what that was like.

I tend to greet each day with a groan, instead of a whoop. Not because I’m depressed or anything, I don’t think, but because as soon as I wake up, I’m alerted to the fact everything hurts, and that I need medicine straight away, so it does limit any perception of: “Wow! What a great day ahead!”

I suppose you’re right: some people are born with conditions that mean they’ve NEVER felt good. At least I had a few years when things were mostly alright, although that’s a fading memory now.

I wish I’d appreciated my health more while I still had it - done more. But I suppose most people take their health for granted until it goes on the blink.

T.

x

Hi Sue,

I like your post !

It made me think of myself this morning, taking my wee boy to school. Mums there with their high heels and me in my chunky flat boots and walking stick!

And like you I had many years of lots of fun and feeling very “normal”, I was diagnosed with MS at age 43, though really, really do still wish I was still “normal”, but we gotta make the best of what we got, at least my walking stick is girly and funky

Jools X

Oh Sue, I know just how you feel! I look back now and wonder how on earth I managed to do all the stuff I did.

What with work, cooking, cleaning & looking after the kids, I wish now that I’d taken a bit more time to chill out and relax but as they say “while man plans, God laughs”.

My handbag is more like a rucksack now and weighs a ton, with emergency meds, snacks, folding stick etc. and the lippy and eyeliner have been replaced with baby wipes and tennalady! All I need now is my passport and a folding rainhat and I’ll be my Nan!

In some ways, it’s quite liberating. I like my armpit huggers and my flat sandals and dressing for comfort and the way I no longer care if people give me strange looks if I’m wobbling all over the shop or I can’t get my money out of my purse. And most importantly, I like me more.

I would love to have all that energy back but not my ‘old’ life. I have learned a lot over the last few years and I think at last I truly appreciate what I do have.

Mags

I’m sitting here looking at my first wheelchair they delivered this morning…I know how you feel

Pip

Hugs Pip, although not at that stage i can relate to this post. Never thought i would reach the stage of

not wearing my beloved boots but i’m scared i’ll wobble.

Take care sonia x

Pip Ive sent you a pm, and thankyou to the rest of you girls, it reminds me I have to get a grip! Appreciate what I have got and the fact i have a very large handbag!

Suex

I know what you mean Sue. I think I’ve already forgotten what ‘normal’ feels like. I’d so adore to have a ‘normal’ bladder again and be like all of my family who take about 20 seconds to go to the loo and pee - it takes me about 30 mins! Am being shown ISC next week which is even less ‘normal’ I guess but it may give me more of a ‘normal’ daily life again. Heres’s hoping. Yes to comfortable footwear, clothes and rattling with meds. Oh well, it is what it is. We just get on with it, don’t we? Teresa xx

hiya

i hear what u are saying-i do.

being normal is commonplace-i prefer to think i am unique-just like everyone else

i always have enjoyed a challenge-just didnt expect it to be at this extent!

accept and adjust is best way forward i think…

have a happy day all

ellie x

This illness stinks, at least with you guys I can have a laugh at it !! motivation on your own is hard and getting priorities right is the same. Some posts humble me…

Suex

Each and every one of your replies have sooo got this into perspective for me.

Take care all

Suex

I have never met a “normal” woman with a small handbag and didn’t think they came in that size. Surely it’s now just a matter of what you fill them up with?

[quote=“whammel”]

I have never met a “normal” woman with a small handbag and didn’t think they came in that size. Surely it’s now just a matter of what you fill them up with?

[/quote] Thanks for reminding me whammel! One time of day I plonked it down and danced around it!! These days its still filled with the same rubbish but a few little extras and I can almost dance around it although everyone will think Ive had plenty to drink when I havent even touched the stuff!

Suex

Whammel forgot the shoes and accessories. They range from a scrunchie to an AMG SLS Mercedes

Wb

Hi, well I call the way I am now my new normal. I dont think any of us here are what youd call abnormal.which is the opposite of normal.

I cant wear heels, skirts or zip up trousers now, but I buy clothes that dont need ironing, shoes I can safely transfer in, and pull up trousers.

The new normal can take some getting used to and as many of us know, even the new normal changes if our particular brand of MS is progressive.

However, I retain the right to be treated normally, with just a little extra consideration. Not much to ask for, is it?

luv Pollx

You know what Poll, I spent ages looking for another word when I wrote it because I didn’t want it read in the wrong context, I couldn’t find one so thats why I put apostrophes around it. Maybe healthy would have been more appropriate.

You are absolutely right, ‘new normal’ just takes a little time getting used to. Never could walk properly in those b*** heels anyway, even on a good day!

Suex

Ay yeh! When I see girls/women teetering on those heels, I wonder what their feet will be like down the line.

I felt excited yesterday, when I bought a pair of boots with a 2inch wedge!!!

luv Pollx

Steady on girl, you could do yourself a mischief in those!

Seriously tho’, my thread meant to read ‘feel normal’ not ‘be normal’. It whizzed off before I had read it properly and of course you cant correct things on this forum.

Suex

It is interesting how this moment creeps up on a person - when suddenly you stand back and look at all the various subtle changes that have crept stealthily into your life and think, ‘What the heck?!’ It keeps on happening, too - or it does with me, anyway.

Alison

x

Hi Folks,

I’m 44 years old and just over one year down the line since diagnosis, and I can’t get my head properly around my “new normal”, now and again I’m accepting the changes, and trying to be positive and thankful for all the good things in my life but most of the time I’m not there yet with it and get angry for example when my leg doesn’t do what I think it should be able to do, what it always could do in the past for years and years or when I get brain fog and my head’s in another planet etc… I’m really trying to grab on to the things I can still do rather than those I can’t, or have to do differently and to a lesser extent.

My MS nurse (whos great!) and my GP (whos also great!) feel that I’ve accepted that I have MS and can say it to people without crying and as part of a mater of fact conversation, but that I have not accepted the “new me” yet. I’m going on an NHS course / focus group next week called “looking to the future” to help me move forward with myself and my life as it is now (though with MS that’s forever changing!) I appreciate reading the posts and comment from folk like Poll, thanks…you’re so positive, accepting and up beat !..I hope I get there one day…

Jools

X