OK, forgive me for sounding over-protective. I just didn’t like the thought of you down a remote country lane somewhere, with someone you don’t know terribly well. It could be dangerous - but yeah, just awkward too, if you get to that moment when you realise the date has not been a great success, and you just want to go. Instead of which, you’d be stuck there with him, and presumably have to travel all the way back with him.
I know I’m a bit of a worry-bunny - always looking at the “what ifs”, but really, if you’re just testing the water, and don’t know for sure a date with him will really work, I think you need to pick somewhere you can’t be stranded alone with him, and can easily make your excuses to go.
The other thing that made me a bit wary of him (sorry if I’ve got this muddled - or got YOU muddled with another poster) was I believe he’s been discussing whether or not he’d want children (with you!) before you’ve even been on a date? Now I’m all for people being honest about their hopes and expectations relatively early, to avoid misunderstandings later (some friends of mine got married without ever realising he wanted children, but she didn’t), but I’m highly wary of people who are imagining your future life together, and whether or not to have babies, BEFORE you’ve even been on one date. That’s not normal behaviour, and sounds like an obsessive or a fantasist. Apologies if he didn’t do that, and I’ve got mixed up with someone else.
You are vulnerable, and have endured what appears to have been a controlling or abusive relationship in the past. You may have trouble recognizing a “normal” relationship. But deciding you’re “The One” before you’ve even been on one date certainly isn’t normal. It may seem extremely flattering if someone’s very keen, very soon. But it normally means they’ve fallen for a fantasy version of you, as they can’t possibly know the real one.
Tina
x
Yeah we’re just friends I don’t really want to rush into another relationship. The kids conversation was actually about as my friend his cousin just had a baby and he wS at the christening and his nephew lives close to him so he babysits a bit. I just want to get settled In a new life with my kids get the house etc sorted, I’ve been asked on other dates but I is always find reasons not to go. And thn honest the kids get everything from me. By the time I’ve seen to them, organised the house, did paper work etc there’s nothing left for anyone else. Which is what I was thinking when I posted this. I don’t think it’s actually possible to date. When I posted this I was thinking generally not about that guy. Just men in general. I do think too much and it was just on is it fair to them when getting through the day is hard enough, Anyway it’s a beautiful day and I’m so excited I’ve been feeding my garden and with the lovely weather the past few days I’ve loads of flowers popped up. Think it’s more good luck than my expert gardening skills haha. 
I think you will know when the time is right, but do not put it off because of ms. Children and time are just excuses, but do as YOU FEEL. I met my fiancé for the first time in a Garden Centre. Plenty of people about, loads to look at and discuss, so no fear of being stranded alone with him. Just enjoy the newness and finding out about each other. At least you will have tried - and won’t be thinking ‘what if’ in a few years time. Jackie x
I met a girl in the supper market one day she asked me out I told her straight away I have MS we went out I told her how bad it was before I started my new treatment that I was in a wheelchair I needed a lot of care I’m fairly ok now but I never know what the future might hold.
We went out on a date and got on like a house on fire she knows I can’t walk the best some days I need a stick or a crutch and if we’re out for the day and it involves alot of walking or we just go out for a walk with the dog I’ll use my wheelchair I was scared to use it at the start in case it might have put her off but Its her that makes me use it she see’s how i’d struggle to walk when I get tired after walking a bit I can really be myself warts and all lol we’re going out 3 years past in March and we’ll be engaged 2 years now in August this year we’ve got our own house and are really happy.
If you find the right person It won’t matter what you have if they love you thats all that does matter If you tell them you have MS and they do a runner they weren’t worth having in your live thats me I told my fiance right from the very start I didn’t want to waste my time.
I was with my ex 7 years we had the date set for our wedding and everything it was the 7th July 2007 I was diagnosed with MS in September 2006 but by christmas of the same year she put me in my wheelchair dropped me of at my partents told my mother to look after that she didn’t want me and drove off that was tuff I just felt like ending it all she took house and whatever money I had.
But I’d do it all again In a heart beat I was never happier than I am now I’ve found the best girl I could have ever hoped to met I used to think know one would ever want me but I was wrong I try and see the good in everything even MS if it wasn’t for MS I would never have been as happy as I am now MS showed me who really matter in my life and who my real friends where.
Mark
hear hear mark-she types through tear filled eyes. you are so right-u never know how life will turn out but we spend so much time worrying re it and thats pointless. just live it!
ellie x
hear hear mark-she types through tear filled eyes. you are so right-u never know how life will turn out but we spend so much time worrying re it and thats pointless. just live it!
ellie x