It must be something in the water, yesterday (20th) was a particuarily horrible day for me too, I felt lost and as if all my life lines had been cut. My normal I can do this attitude had gone, I’m having to arrange for my prized car to be taken away, it’s not the four wheels and stupid powerful engine I’m going to miss it’s the symbol, it’s what it represents, it’s my freedom. I’m 2 years away from my 40th and had certain plans I know it was daft now, but not once did my hubby tell me to get my self together, he just held me, he knew it wasn’t the car, it was just coming to terms with what is wrong with me, for all of us. My husband also cried, only second time in my life I’ve seen him do it.
Anyway my point is, I had to allow myself that time to grieve, to FEEL to feel it all, the loss of what I’d had what I’d thought my life was, and what my new life will be. It’s just a redirection. But Paul allow yourself time, but I will say I am on anti depressants, I couldn’t do this not on them, and I promise I fought taking them for such a long time, but they have simply helped me cope with these days, and come out the other side, where before, they would last for weeks.
Talking is vital, talking to your family is not weakness, it’s openness and honesty they need to know how you feel too, and there’s always here, but talking to your MS nurse or GP is good too no one ever judges you for beng honest. Sending you a gentle hug,