hello friends feeling pretty low at moment
i am 50yrs old i have a great wife and a wonderfull 8yr old son both of wich i love very much but my head is messed not long since got confirmed diag of ppms but trying hard to stay positive i feel alone but know i am not i need to meet people in the same boat as me i think so am going to look for meetings near me
well sorry people rant over
paul
Paul Pat said to me recently don’t apologise on here because your feeling crap. We all in more or lesser degrees know what your going through. I have a marvellous family three grown up children three grandsons and an absolute marvellous wife who fights for me tooth and nail. Yet at times I feel as depressed as a tyre with a hole in it, I cry and am awfully depressed. I question the slightest thing etc etc. I spend far to long on my computer because I am safe here I don’t have to think. I talk to people and the 're live the conversation in my head questioning why they said this or that. Paranoid or what? I take antidepressants without them I am even worse. Speak to your GP the will help And if you have an ms nurse talk to here she could point you in the direction of groups etc.
Don
Hi Paul
I know what you’re going through, I was first dx with RRMS in January with my neuro referring me to his colleague (MS Specialist) who in turn reclassified my dx to PPMS in June. During those months it’s was a massive emotional roller coaster for me to, but with the love and support of my fantastic wife and close pals, plus the new friends I’ve met through the local branch of this society and the MS therapy centre in Reading I’m adjusting and coming to terms gradually.
Check out the “near me” section of this site for stuff happening in your area.
I’ve recently started group physio sessions at the BMSTC, as I’m cr@p at going exercise on my own, which also helps and you get to meet more fellow MSers.
You just need a little more time, you’ll soon see that it’s not all doom and gloom just different.
Best of luck and don’t worry about coming on here and having a rant or two, no one will be judging you as we’re all in the same sh1t, just at different levels.
PD
Hi Paul,
It must be something in the water, yesterday (20th) was a particuarily horrible day for me too, I felt lost and as if all my life lines had been cut. My normal I can do this attitude had gone, I’m having to arrange for my prized car to be taken away, it’s not the four wheels and stupid powerful engine I’m going to miss it’s the symbol, it’s what it represents, it’s my freedom. I’m 2 years away from my 40th and had certain plans I know it was daft now, but not once did my hubby tell me to get my self together, he just held me, he knew it wasn’t the car, it was just coming to terms with what is wrong with me, for all of us. My husband also cried, only second time in my life I’ve seen him do it.
Anyway my point is, I had to allow myself that time to grieve, to FEEL to feel it all, the loss of what I’d had what I’d thought my life was, and what my new life will be. It’s just a redirection. But Paul allow yourself time, but I will say I am on anti depressants, I couldn’t do this not on them, and I promise I fought taking them for such a long time, but they have simply helped me cope with these days, and come out the other side, where before, they would last for weeks.
Talking is vital, talking to your family is not weakness, it’s openness and honesty they need to know how you feel too, and there’s always here, but talking to your MS nurse or GP is good too no one ever judges you for beng honest. Sending you a gentle hug,
Polly xxx
Hi Paul and Polly, sending you some virtual (hugs))))) hope tomorrow is better for both of you, in fact (((((hugs))))) for everyone on this forum.
Pam x
Hi Paul, sorry to hear you’re having such a rough time.
You know depression with MS is very common… and not surprising as we have a double whammy… living with MS is enough to depress anybody but also the lesions in our brains affect our emotions as much as they do our physical body or our cognitive function (which gives us poor memory).
Sometimes those lesions can cause depression, anger, anxiety… or they can go the other way and cause euphoria! Surprising but true.
Lots of us on here take antidepressants… and they really do work!
I woud give them a try if I were you. Why live with feeling so c r a p (sorry had to space that out to avoid the big-brother filter!)… if you can get something from the GP that WILL help?
Go and chat with your GP. It’s worth a try. If you don’t like them you can come off them… but I think you should give them a go.
Every single one of us on this board know what you’re going through Paul. We’ve all been there believe me. We’re all here to support you. I can promise you that these feelings will not last forever. PPMS is an enormous thing to get your head around, so a little help from the GP will be worthwhile to help you get through this.
Yes see if you can find meetings near you… and as Don said, you never need to apologise for showing your feelings on here. That’s what friends are for.
Pat xx
Thank you people i am much better now just needed a rant
I have been on anti deps for a long time anyway and they have helped me so much just gets to me sometimes,
just seems neverending ppms is just another thing LOL
i also have a list other things which are an enlarged prostat and crones desease so good fun tee hee
take everyone and rememer have as much as you can !!!
Paul