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Family holiday from hell

Hi

Nearly two weeks ago I returned from a family holiday which was the first in years.

What started off as perfect with three generations having a brilliant time together soon turned into a holiday from hell.

I won’t go into detail about how things kicked off but the result was my daughter and daughter in law to be fell out as I did with my 14 year old grandaughter. My eldest son and myself were exchanging nasty texts. For five days I cried and cried and did not care if I lived or not. My family was divided not just for the duration of the holiday but for years to come.

Naturally my physical and mental health hit rock bottom including massive problems with my vision.

I am now in diazapan and referral has been made to mental health team.

My eldest sons girlfriend is posting nasty comments on facebook and is even calling my two year old grandson.

I have been sleeping round the clock,.not eating properly and now anxious much of the time.

Things are never going to be the same and that in itself is a loss that I am trying to deal with.

I know there’s no magic cure but just wanted to express how I’m feeling.

Thanks christine

Oh Christine, how sad.

When families fracture in a sudden, deeply unpleasant way it’s so very difficult. When you have MS, obviously the worry, upset and stress is likely to impact on your health.

You have my sympathy, you know you can lean on your friends here. I hope you have good friends in the ‘real’ world too.

Sue

Sorry to hear that your family have been arguing.It wont do your MS any good at all.I have a very volatile family that dont get on much and i have had to accept it over the years.I have had to distance myself a lot from them and keep family events to a minimum.Its my daughter that’s the worse. She gets in a strop if she doesn’t get her own way and is very moody too.I am always treading on eggshells around her.Its exhausting.

Thanks Sue and Jaycee your replies mean alot.

Yesterday I did something normal and went to see a show with relatives.

Yes I do have a couple of good friends and my daughter is supportive.

I feel I need to find something that I can do and enjoy doing.shen all your energy goes into your family it can be lonely when things fall apart.

Take care christine

GOD I HATE MEDIA!

I hate facebook.

My grandson told me to go and F myself after a silly argument over politics.

I tried to patch my grand daughter and her mothers huge arguments and ended up loosing her altogether.

I coped by blocking my grandson and telling him before i did so you are an ungrateful brat i will always love you, but you are not going to disrespect me not after the support I have given you.

I havent heard from or seen my grand daughter for several years since my husband died.

I dont CARE.

Its her decision not mine. I refuse to let thier pettiness to upset me. She hasnt spoke to her mum either.

My grandson is back now and we made up and i know she will be too one day but i blocked all content.

He knew i was mad.

change your phone number block her off facebook. You dont need this crap, and why should you accept it? Let them all stew together as believe me they will be back.

I wont let family get to me anymore. We loose them soon enough.

In DEATH.

what is the point to it all really its probably down to a really silly argument and just exacerbated.

I gave them time out and it has worked with one, the other one well i am not bothered either way, i know she is safe and that is all that matters for now. I dont have time to worry about her childish ways. she is 21. I took her out of my will and i know my grandson has told her lol. I am not about to reward bad behaviour i never did anything wrong.

REALLY. My eldest sons girlfriend is posting nasty comments on facebook and is even calling my two year old grandson

Really your son will always be your son, but i can guarantee his girlfriend will be like a ship that passes in the night and why are you allowing her to get to you. like i said BLOCK HER off facebook. Not sure what you mean about her calling your two year old grandson, does he have a mobile? He is old enough to be dragged into this at 2?

when you read it back you will probably think to yourself crikey what the hell.

2 year old?

the girl is a nut job. childish and immature. Let them have thier childish little tantrums.

Turn them all off from your life now, and yes go and enjoy yourself which you can still do.

BY putting them on the naughty step they will have time to cool off as there wont be an audience anymore. It will all fade away and you will heal slowly.

but for now you dont have to take it.

Some people never come home from a holiday, so at least you all still have strong feelings for each other as they did come back even if its still in anger. but anger fades if you let it.

NON of it is worth making yourself so ill over it.

xxxxxxxxxx it too will pass. believe me. I lost both my grand daughters from my husbands side big argument with him and his daughter. It dragged me into it, but now after his death just before we were back together slowly and now we talk all the time on messenger and whats app and i can enjoy mikes (my husbands) new great grand daughter but i let them come back to me as i knew i had nothing to do with the pettiness of it, and his daughter will never come back, and i dont care to be honest as she is a waste of space. I am not about to worry about her. i have my own stuff to deal with.

we control our life not them. BIG HUGS. xxxxxxxxx facebook OFF, change number. BLISS. quiet awww sweet lol. xxxxx

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Blinkin’ heck Christine and CC. I never realised just how lucky I am. Having seen how some people are on Facebook, I deleted my account. I make an effort to speak with or meet up with real friends and not the numerous virtual ones. The vast majority of my family are OK and I do not waste time or valuable energy on those who cause grief. The close confines of a shared holiday can highlight the different strains within my family but for those who want to avoid confrontation we can, and for those who want an explosive shout, we can. However no one would dream of using texts or “social” media to air our differences. This reduces festering misunderstandings. I really hope you can move on with as small an impact on your health as possible. Good luck Mick

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I admire your strength. I’m not at that stage yet but slowly each day is improving. I don’t know how family relationships with be in the future but at the moment no contact is giving me space to evaluate a d put everything into perspective.

Thanks christine

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Thanks Mick.

Yes the comments of Facebook are hurtful and j have not responded. When the comments were aimed at my 2 year old grandson it really did speak volumes about the sender.

Thanks christine

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Ah families! Best advice you’ve been given in the previous posts, leave it, park it do what you can manage but don’t dwell on it. It happens more often than you think. After my Mum died me and my sister had an almighty ruck because I wouldn’t change the Will my Mum had left in my favour, she did leave her some but not half - for good reasons I might add. This resulted in solicitors getting involved and she suddenly backed down because she didn’t want to fight it - I wonder why? My sister, brother-in-law, four nieces, nephews and various children no longer have any contact with me. I have never really worried about it although at times I do wonder how they are but at the end of the day it’s their choice. Time is the thing, memories fade and often families reunite, probably not in my case but there you go. I have to say though, it saves on Christmas cards, end of!

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