Seams to me that all you carers out there must be really happy with your lot as I don’t see many posts. Could I ask a question, where do you send your carrees for respite? I can’t seem to find anywhere suitable for my partners needs.
I think it be more apt, if you ask your partner where they themselves would like to go, rather than making a decision for them based on people here. I know this reply sounds harsh, but if you come on to a forum which is mainly supported by MSers, it’s a bit of a kick in the teeth to think we are incapable of making our own decisions
I’m sorry I didn’t mean to offend anyone, that’s why I posted in this category.
Ok, apology accepted. It’s just that sometimes it feels we have so many things being taken from us at times when we are ill, vision, walking, you will know what I mean, as a carer yourself. It feels like all we have at times are our faculties. I know it might be a delicate subject to raise with your partner, but at a time when they are feeling less than empowered, maybe letting them make that decision, will give them a sense of control, and not hold a grudge with you. I am just looking at it from the sufferers perspective, that’s all. As a carer though, you need a break from a totally dependent person. So I am sorry if I came out all guns blazing. Hope you both get some kind of relief.
Hi, I hope you dont mind me butting in here…but I may be able to offer some info.
I am a caree and go to The Bond Hotel in Blackpool. These hotels which cater for my needs are as rare as hen`s teeth!
The Bond is fab. Last year was my first visit and on first look, I wondered f i`d done the right thing in going there.
2 of my 4 carers went with me. we all had a fab time. The rooms were a bit tatty, but they are refurbing them all. They have electric beds, hoists, roll in showers, commodes. The food is superb.
We are going again in may for 4 nights. it cost £60 a night for bed, brekkie, sandwiches for lunch, and a good eveing meal. There is entertainment every night, which we loved.
If you want they can provide carers too.
luv Pollx
First of all to anonymous my partner relys on me for everything 15years with ms gradual decline, won’t go into it. To poll thanks for that I’ll be looking into that.
Hello Anon,One of the reasons that carers don’t post a lot on here is because they get interference from ‘The Carees’ e.g. the first answer to your question.A lot of people with MS aren’t able to decide for themselves where to go.If you have a good local Carers organisation they will give you information.Especially if you need help with paying for the respite.Also speak with Adult Care Services.If you google MS respite you will find one or two providers but they are expensive.
Rachel hello,
I’m probably in a similar position to yourself in that my wife has also been on a gradual decline for the past 15 years.
I am now her full time carer and also have four Council Home Care visits daily. We went through a lot of changes last year and things got quite difficult. However we did for the first time take the plunge for respite care. I didn’t feel that people caring for her at home while I went away was practical and going into a Council home wasn’t an option (I’m 45 and my wife is 52 so we suffer from the “you’re too young to get that” reply).
This may not suit you at all depending on where you are but I settled for Leuchie House in North Berwick outside of Edinburgh. I understand people travel a fair distance to take their respite breaks there.
My wife went last December and again at the end of February this year. She is booked in again for June and November this year. They offer a 10 day break (and I think shorter ones) and full 24hr nursing care for any level of dependency. Our experience so far has been fantastic. Lovely setting, great staff & food as well as planned outings and activities etc. Also good to know they can deal with any issues that crop up ie Catheter changes, skin management, infections etc.
I would say it’s not cheap and cost is driven by the level of dependency they assess you as pre-admission. We’ve funded the last two breaks via our own savings but are looking via Social Work for a contribution towards future funding.
It may not be of any use at all depending on where you are in the country but if you look them up online at least you’ll get an idea of what sort of things on offer.
As per the previous poster I dearly wish my wife was able to arrange her own respite but she’s just not capable of that anymore. I, possibly like yourself have no option but to step in and arrange these things on her behalf.
Really does make a huge difference getting the respite so I hope you get something sorted.
Hope this helps.
Derek.