Hello again,
So today i spoke to my Ms Nurse about getting Sativex prescribed. I was told outcome unlikely as the cost is too high, but maybe able to get it privately. Now this makes NO sense to me. Please let me explain:
I am lucky I have only had this disease for about 2 years. When I got diagnosed i was a recreational weed smoker. I went to work, but i found it a nice way of unwinding after the day. (many enjoy using alcohol, i always found, i felt fresher the next day smoking weed to drinking alcohol. each to their own).
When i was eventually diagnosed (like many, it could have be, but wasnât a easy process) i was told about the many drugs they can offer to aid to pain. I was a bit wary as i think most pharmacy drugs are poison (my view is that pharmaceutical company prescribe these drugs to aid a problem as well as cause a new one) but as my spasm in my feet were terrible and my legs were stiff and painful to i thought id try anything.
I was prescribed (sorry for my spelling here but they make it hard)
Amitriptyline - this drug although can be prescribe as a anti-depressent, send me to a dark place, i was highly depressed, i could even get out of bed most days (still have the odd day). Itâs hard to write but i had thoughts of ending it all (glad i didnât0
gabapentin - this drug wasnât good either, I was craving crap food, i gained alot of weight as i donât exercise like i did pre MS. that also lead to depression.
carbamazepine - This drug i didnât get on well with either.
With all these drugs prescribed ALL in the warning lefeat said DONâT take if:
you have kidney problems, heart problems, stomach problms etc. why does it warn this? because its un-natural any the body can only cope with a little bit of âpoisionâ.
whilst on this medication i stopped smoking cannabis, did it help my feet NO. Did i feel better? NO my feet were still cramping up, i still had tremours down my right arm, my headaches were as bad if not worse. and now my head waas very heavy, thinking was more of a chellege. O got so low i didnât want to leave my room and could only think of negative things.
I decided to stop taking those âman made drugsâ and look elsewhere for a âherbal remedyâ.
A year down the line. I have improved so much!!! phyically, mentally and emotionally, yes my feet still bother me but my mind is normally distracted enough not to notice. I smoke between ÂŁ60-ÂŁ100 of cannabis per week. its expensive but i believe itâs natural and harm free (and i know the strain and the grower). I can see how much it has helped, my feet now rarley spasm (still sentive), my tremour in my arm has gone and when im high people have be impressed with my walking. Most people donât have a issue with cannabis (may have part took themself), the ones that do (proberley never have part took and dont understand) believe itâs illegal for a reason even though studies now prove the benefits. iâm guessing most people that donât approve drink alcohol (a poison with NO health benefits) because they believe its social acceptable. I can only try to explain the difference in me.
The one thing that i do thats bad is smoke. I smoke to get high. I smoke cannabis joints only. i have tried to use it with food. This way i can quit smoking. The effects when eating it were sensational. Ill try to explain, when you smoke cannabis, your brain feels the high as much or more than the body, this doesnât help cognitive behaviour (but atleast i can always blame the weed). When eaten its defiantly more of a body high, my legs felt better than they have done since Ms. But eating cannabis is even more expensive. ÂŁ200 the make great cannabutter (cannabis butter) eating 3/4 cookies a day doesnât fit with my diet.
I was also approached by a man in his car, who told me he could help me as he make cannabis oil for cancer patients. he also was on his way to give a old gentleman a bath. (now where i live South Yorkshire good Samaritans are few and far between, actually never met one. Very cautious) and I know cannabis oils are also super expensive So I thought Id try a get it legally, before entertaining this idea.
I spoke with my MS nurse, who told me one doctor in my area has been able to get funding for only 2 patients who are both in wheelchair bound state and they have to take other drugs. I think i was told that i would have to try the drugs i mentioned before aswell as other drugs in high dosage,and only after taking all that âpoisonâ i may be considered.This could be a long drawn out process, which may cause me much pain. I think I done bloody fantastic this year being able to get off them (i have tysbri treatment each month, everyone there is taking some sort of prescription drug, apart from me.) I SMOKE CANNABIS. The only other way is private which again iâll be paying for which is part of the reason to ask for sativex.
Im confused!!!
Do I really have to become worse before i can get better?
Keep smiling