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Can anyone help?

I have been diagnosed with Remitting M.S for around 18 months. I am 43 years old. Last year I had 4 relapses. I started on the disease modifying drugs (Rebif) for the last 6 months but I can’t or don’t know how to accept it. I have nightmares, panic attacks and then I try to dismiss the fact I have this thing called M.S. I have a wonderful husband but I cry every time he says anything about it. I fear the worst. I think of it as a death sentence. Does anyone else feel like this.

Hi Caroline Sorry you’re having a hard time. Your feelings & reactions are understandable & will have been experienced by many of us on the Forum. I can relate to your situation; I’m 44 & was diagnosed just over a year ago. I think the hardest part for me has been starting to come to terms with it. My starting point was the neurologist telling me that this isn’t a death sentence. For me, anxiety triggers my symptoms so I’ve made a point of reducing any anxiety levels. Have you spoken to your gp about the way you’re feeling? She/he may be able to suggest ways to help you reduce your panic attacks & nightmares, & start to help you come terms with it. The MS helpline may also be a good place for you to chat to someone who can understand about the way you’re feeling. I hope you understand you’re certainly not alone in the way you feel, and I hope it starts to get easier for you Jane xx

Hi

As Jane said, many of us can relate to what you’re feeling, and is completely normal. I did my best to ignore the diagnosis at first, and whenever I started to think about it I would freak out - like you, I thought it was the end of my life. But, time slowly moved on. I went through all the classic stages of grief as I mourned the loss of my old life - denial, anger, depression etc. Eventually I began to come to terms with it. It’s not been easy of course, and I’ve been through some incredibly tough times. But I coped (I read a book a while ago about fear, and it said one of the biggest things we fear is that we’ll not be able to cope).

Since diagnosis though, in many ways I live a more fulfilled life. This isn’t to say I’m happy to have MS - I’d love for a cure to be found. But I’ve had more opportunities as a result - I’ve seen my team lift the FA Cup at Wembley, I’ve done a skydive, I’m going to learn to fly later this year, I now have a role on an NHS research funding committee. None of those things would have happened without MS. You may well not want to hear any of that stuff now, which is understandable so ignore it if it doesn’t help, but I say it anyway in the hope that it might plant a little seed in you that there is life after diagnosis.

For now though, it may well be worth getting referred for counselling or Cognitive Behavoural Therapy, as they should help you process what you’re feeling and deal with the panic attacks.

I really hope that helps, and I want to say again that what you’re feeling is normal, but you can get through it.

Dan

Good advice from Dan and Jane.

Caroline, it is such early days for you. I cannot remember how long it was before I could speak of MS without dissolving into tears, but it was certainly longer than 18 months. It isn’t that you’re not coping: right now that IS how you are coping. But it gets easier - truly it does - it just takes time. Hang on in there.

Alison

Hi Caroline - sorry you’re feeling bad at the moment.

It is tough, I got an episode first in July 2012 and since have intermittently suffered with anxiety, feeling down and just sheer desperation at times. I also try and tell myself nothing is wrong although I have issues most weeks.

A big help was finding out (well after a HUGE amount of pushing) that my Vitamin B12 & Vitamin D were extremely low. I pushed to get some B12 shots and Vit D tablets and within 4 weeks, I started to feel so much better in terms of moods/anxiety and lowness.

It’s worth speaking with your GP to see what your levels are and it certainly could help. Note, my B12 was 156 and my vitamin D was 5 (both very low) but I had to convince my GP to help. It’s definitly worth checking.

Feel better soon. There are good days x

Hi Caroline - sorry you’re feeling bad at the moment.

It is tough, I got an episode first in July 2012 and since have intermittently suffered with anxiety, feeling down and just sheer desperation at times. I also try and tell myself nothing is wrong although I have issues most weeks.

A big help was finding out (well after a HUGE amount of pushing) that my Vitamin B12 & Vitamin D were extremely low. I pushed to get some B12 shots and Vit D tablets and within 4 weeks, I started to feel so much better in terms of moods/anxiety and lowness.

It’s worth speaking with your GP to see what your levels are and it certainly could help. Note, my B12 was 156 and my vitamin D was 5 (both very low) but I had to convince my GP to help. It’s definitly worth checking.

Feel better soon. There are good days x

Just thought about the B12 issue, if you are low it could help to get the B12 spray someone mentioned recently on the forum…will try to find it for you.

Hi Elljay - I also use the spray inbetween shots (for both)

Better You B12 Boost & Better You D - both are excellent & available on Amazon plus other health shops.

Hi Elljay - I also use the spray inbetween shots (for both)

Better You B12 Boost & Better You D - both are excellent & available on Amazon plus other health shops.

Thank you all for taking the time to reply. I will ask to have my vit b levels checked. I do take calcium and vit D. Xx