…Everything becomes sickeningly clear.
Good evening all.
I’m going to see my GP tomorrow. I know I cannot diagnose myself and that I have a long wait for referalls and reviewing and crossing stuff out. But I suspect I have MS. It’s a concern thats been knocking around my head since I mentioned it to my last GP 6 months ago (For the record my previous GP was appaling - not just with me, but with other people I know who werent ever reffered when they asked and had to seek second opinions for occasionally serious conditions - if you went in with concerns you were treated as a hypochondriac)
Since that initial 6 month ago conversation I’d pushed it out of my head and forgotten it. Until this week.
I’ll give you a quick overview, I’m 27 (much to my disgust) and until last night hadn’t realised I’d been having symptoms for nearly 10 years. Like a magic eye picture, all this random unexplained “Stuff” slotted into one great big whole.
First and formost - I have spasms. I’ve had them for at least 8/9 years, I dont exactly remember when they started, but it’s like a wave that in 1-2 seconds total my back shoulder arm and neck muscles contract sharply causing my head to snap back violently and arms to flail. It’s embarrassing but It was infrequent, once every 2 -3 weeks, sometimes months without one. Then last night I had 5 in the space of three minutes leaving my shoulders burning in agony.
I also twitch. My leg bounces when sitting, My hands shake when I try and reach for something, the further I reach the worse it gets. I get very stiff hips and legs which results in a painful back because those muscles over compensate. I also get spasms and cramps in the bottom of my foot which have me sobbing in tears
I get exhausted, like honest to god couldnt get out of bed if my life depended on it exhausted, where everything from the armpits down feels its been filled with lead.
I stutter and slur - I never used to - thats probably 5? 6 years now?
2 years ago I was told I had one eye short-sighted, one long sighted, and that was why i got headaches. Prescribed glasses, 1 year later the headaches were back with a vengence so was checked, my long-sighted eye, was now shortsighted, and worse than the original short-sighted eye. As of last night I can’t see diddly squat out of it, it’s like i’ve smeared vasaline over my cornea.
I struggle to swallow sometimes, food getting ‘lodged’ halfway down and taking a long time to move, I’ve had fun and games with my bowels for years (I’ve kinda got to the point where crippling constipation is a cyclic occurance)
My balance is shocking, its ALWAYS beeen bad, but not like this, this is something else entirely. I was told about 8 months ago I had vertigo, after staggering to the GP, having been thrown out of a supermarket because I swayed and fell, and my stuttered slurred speach meant they thougth I was drunk.
The last week and a half or so I’ve been swayying, the room spinning if i turn too quickly, and generally havign a crap time of it. I describe it as “Being drunk without the fun bit”
I have times where my memory is in tatters. I have - an exceptional long term memory, can remember details of demented amounts of information, I know every bank-card number in my wallet and most peoples phone numbers. Can I remember if i’ve had breakfast some days? can I ****.
I feel, frankly, like death at the moment. If I over-do it walking around I become exhausted very quickly, far more so than I should do for a woman in her mid-late 20’s. I’m no fitness nut, but climbing 1 set of stairs to my flat should not leave my head spinning and me ready to go to sleep.
10 years ago I had a series of x-rays and checks, because I was complaining of pins and needles in my arms. In the end it started to fade and was filed under ‘eh- dunno’. I still get them now and again. If i’m stressed or unwell its more likely, they start at my throat just below my jaw, and run down both arms, over my chest, neck, to the base of my ribs if-not lower and are excruciating. Like the type if you’ve sat on your foot for 4 hours then tried to walk on it.
Of course all of this comes and goes leaving me feeling like either i’m making a fuss, or being a hypochondriac.
But the thing that caught my eye last night when reading? The thing that suddenly made a lot of sense, and caused the magic eye picture?
The MS Hug.
For YEARS I’ve had chest pains, and back pains, around mid rib that starts as a ‘tensing’ at the back, and wraps around my chest leaving me fighting for breath, often climaxing in stabbing and burning pain at my breastbone, which will last anything between minutes and days. And then go weeks without it. I for the duration I am stiff, badtempered, frequently forgetting to eat, I’ve so far been blaiming poorly fitting bra’s, lifting something stupid (even if i can’t remember lifting anything), I’d mentioned it to doc’s once or twice and been told it was an anxiety attack, or strain on the muscles between ribs caused by lifting or moving oddly.
So yeah. Evening all.
Right now I am lying on my bed exhausted laptop nearly resting on my face, with one eye shut so I dont have the blurred garbage messing with my ability to read.
So. Thoughts? I’m not asking for diagnosis or anything, but Have I really maybe seen a magic eye picture? Or am I just a hypochondriac who should really REALLY stop googling symptoms.
~ Fruitcake.
; second one is to that, yes, everything you describe can happen in MS, but it can also be caused by treatable things like vitamin deficiencies so please get yourself tested for vitamin B12 deficiency (your symptoms fit well with this) and vitamin D - and every other blood test that your GP can think of!
but for now, wait on the MRI.