Just like a Magic Eye picture....

…Everything becomes sickeningly clear.

Good evening all.

I’m going to see my GP tomorrow. I know I cannot diagnose myself and that I have a long wait for referalls and reviewing and crossing stuff out. But I suspect I have MS. It’s a concern thats been knocking around my head since I mentioned it to my last GP 6 months ago (For the record my previous GP was appaling - not just with me, but with other people I know who werent ever reffered when they asked and had to seek second opinions for occasionally serious conditions - if you went in with concerns you were treated as a hypochondriac)

Since that initial 6 month ago conversation I’d pushed it out of my head and forgotten it. Until this week.

I’ll give you a quick overview, I’m 27 (much to my disgust) and until last night hadn’t realised I’d been having symptoms for nearly 10 years. Like a magic eye picture, all this random unexplained “Stuff” slotted into one great big whole.

First and formost - I have spasms. I’ve had them for at least 8/9 years, I dont exactly remember when they started, but it’s like a wave that in 1-2 seconds total my back shoulder arm and neck muscles contract sharply causing my head to snap back violently and arms to flail. It’s embarrassing but It was infrequent, once every 2 -3 weeks, sometimes months without one. Then last night I had 5 in the space of three minutes leaving my shoulders burning in agony.

I also twitch. My leg bounces when sitting, My hands shake when I try and reach for something, the further I reach the worse it gets. I get very stiff hips and legs which results in a painful back because those muscles over compensate. I also get spasms and cramps in the bottom of my foot which have me sobbing in tears

I get exhausted, like honest to god couldnt get out of bed if my life depended on it exhausted, where everything from the armpits down feels its been filled with lead.

I stutter and slur - I never used to - thats probably 5? 6 years now?

2 years ago I was told I had one eye short-sighted, one long sighted, and that was why i got headaches. Prescribed glasses, 1 year later the headaches were back with a vengence so was checked, my long-sighted eye, was now shortsighted, and worse than the original short-sighted eye. As of last night I can’t see diddly squat out of it, it’s like i’ve smeared vasaline over my cornea.

I struggle to swallow sometimes, food getting ‘lodged’ halfway down and taking a long time to move, I’ve had fun and games with my bowels for years (I’ve kinda got to the point where crippling constipation is a cyclic occurance)

My balance is shocking, its ALWAYS beeen bad, but not like this, this is something else entirely. I was told about 8 months ago I had vertigo, after staggering to the GP, having been thrown out of a supermarket because I swayed and fell, and my stuttered slurred speach meant they thougth I was drunk.

The last week and a half or so I’ve been swayying, the room spinning if i turn too quickly, and generally havign a crap time of it. I describe it as “Being drunk without the fun bit”

I have times where my memory is in tatters. I have - an exceptional long term memory, can remember details of demented amounts of information, I know every bank-card number in my wallet and most peoples phone numbers. Can I remember if i’ve had breakfast some days? can I ****.

I feel, frankly, like death at the moment. If I over-do it walking around I become exhausted very quickly, far more so than I should do for a woman in her mid-late 20’s. I’m no fitness nut, but climbing 1 set of stairs to my flat should not leave my head spinning and me ready to go to sleep.

10 years ago I had a series of x-rays and checks, because I was complaining of pins and needles in my arms. In the end it started to fade and was filed under ‘eh- dunno’. I still get them now and again. If i’m stressed or unwell its more likely, they start at my throat just below my jaw, and run down both arms, over my chest, neck, to the base of my ribs if-not lower and are excruciating. Like the type if you’ve sat on your foot for 4 hours then tried to walk on it.

Of course all of this comes and goes leaving me feeling like either i’m making a fuss, or being a hypochondriac.

But the thing that caught my eye last night when reading? The thing that suddenly made a lot of sense, and caused the magic eye picture?

The MS Hug.

For YEARS I’ve had chest pains, and back pains, around mid rib that starts as a ‘tensing’ at the back, and wraps around my chest leaving me fighting for breath, often climaxing in stabbing and burning pain at my breastbone, which will last anything between minutes and days. And then go weeks without it. I for the duration I am stiff, badtempered, frequently forgetting to eat, I’ve so far been blaiming poorly fitting bra’s, lifting something stupid (even if i can’t remember lifting anything), I’d mentioned it to doc’s once or twice and been told it was an anxiety attack, or strain on the muscles between ribs caused by lifting or moving oddly.

So yeah. Evening all.

Right now I am lying on my bed exhausted laptop nearly resting on my face, with one eye shut so I dont have the blurred garbage messing with my ability to read.

So. Thoughts? I’m not asking for diagnosis or anything, but Have I really maybe seen a magic eye picture? Or am I just a hypochondriac who should really REALLY stop googling symptoms.

~ Fruitcake.


been there done that, well most of 'em anyay, the food lodging and “the hug” are about the only 2 i cant associate with in some way, i was diagnosed with ms 2 months ago, and so far i haven’t had any kind of pain with it, stiff and tired from probably doing too much but unlike a lot of the guys on here no real pain. have you got ms? ain’t got a clue, i can relate to a lot of your symptoms but there’s lots of other things that could be causing them so i’m not going to say “sounds like you might have” cos one thing i’ve learnt in the short time i’ve been on here is, it ain’t ms until a neurologist says it is. sorry this aint really much help, but at least you know you ain’t a hypochondriac but the best advice i can give you is, stop playing dr wikipeadia or you’ll have contracted bubonic plague and be theoretically clinically dead before long.

boo x

Hi Fruitcake!

Welcome to the not so nice club!!

Yes, I can relate to a lot of that too!

Not much advice to give to be honest other than through all the frustration and desperation you’ll need to develop a bottomless pit of patience! xjenxx

Haha cheers Darlin, I systematically avoid Googling symptoms usually, but a mate of mine had told me his muscles twitch (the finest example being when he was ‘with’ his missus, and spasmed, smacking his face on the headboard and breaking his nose, bleeding all over the poor girl - I will admit I near pissed myself laughing), and he’d given me a scientific name for the stupid ‘flails’ (his are caused by other fun and games).

So after last nights attack until it was so painful, and having had to climb out of bed so I didnt inadvertantly batter my boyfriend to death, I decided SOD IT I AM LOOKING THIS UP (hoping possibly for some sort of medievil take three squshed frogs and roll in a field under moonshine and it’ll stop), and yeah. shrugs I know it’s not MS till the neurologist says so, but thank the gods someone else on here has similar things and I am not, as my name would imply, a fruitcake.

Thanks Kizzy, And tbh I’d rather be a member of this club and know I’m not insane and can finally stop my 4am googling making me think I have developed the first ever case of elbow TB…

Hi Fruitcake,

When you see your gp don’t what ever you do is dx yourself. Doc’s like to think they know best. Ask very nicely if he/she could refer you to a neuro because of the symptoms you’ve described to see if they can run some tests on you as there is something not right. He/she may even request a MRI themselves but push gently but firmly for a refarral. Please don’t go guessing what yuou may or may not have as you will only drive yourself mad with worry.



Hi Fruitcake,

I just wanted to say I’m soooo sorry you’re going through this hellish time - I really feel for you. I know that’s not much help, but it’s true anyway! Good luck with getting referrals from your GP.

Morning Fruitcake.

Yes, you need to see a Neurologist (and maybe an Opthalmologist as well) ASAP.

My suggestion (FWIW) is to list all your symptoms but keep the list short. As an example, your paragraph above on spasms can be reduced to: “Frequent severe muscle spasms”. You can also think of “Poor short-term memory”, “numb from the armpits down” and “difficulty swallowing”. Keep it short, keep it sharp. With a bit of work, you could get your list down to less than 100 words. Now lay that on your new GP - and they will have to take notice, because you have put the whole lot together in a simple form. If the GP wants detail, then you give it to them, but not before.

Hope this helps


Thanks all,

Brief update, Went to the opticians as my right eye has gone from blurry to “The world is made of colour and nothing has edges” I was in town with a friend and decided to drop into my opticians.

Following an examination, a nervous look and a phone call:

There is nothing wrong with my eye, which means it’s nerves. I have an appointment with the specialists in the hospital in just over an hour.

My opticion was Nervous. So Yeah Progress I guess…


Hello, and welcome to the site

Couple of things: first one is good luck at the ophthalmologist’s :slight_smile: ; second one is to that, yes, everything you describe can happen in MS, but it can also be caused by treatable things like vitamin deficiencies so please get yourself tested for vitamin B12 deficiency (your symptoms fit well with this) and vitamin D - and every other blood test that your GP can think of!

If they all come back clear, then you definitely need to see a neuro. Actually, you should probably see a neuro even if they don’t.

Good luck with the GP tomorrow too.

Karen x

Good luck with the specialists. Hope they are really helpful - please keep us updated. Teresa xx

Right. Update. Physically my eye is fine, being checked again in 4 weeks at the eye specialist has requested an MRI and is referring me to a neuro. MS was mentioned when discussing it outside the door. Hooray for good hearing :confused: but for now, wait on the MRI.

This sounds like a good result Fruitcake. A referral to a neuro is what you need. Good luck with it and the MRI. Teresa xx

Wishing you good luck with your MRI and getting the referral. Do let us know how you get on.



Firstly- sorry. This is going to be a self pitying sob.

I am exhausted, my legs are heavy and numb, my muscles in my hips across my lower stomach are stiff and spasmed painfully, my back keeps flaring with burning pain as muscles spasm between ribs and crush everything.

I just want to cry I feel so rubbish.

And I dont have a diagnosis or conformation or date for MRI yet (i know only a day really) but just feeling really really crap today.

Hungry as hell, too tired to get off my bum and make something to eat. So much effort.

Urrrrrrrrrrrrrgh :frowning:

Oh Fruitcake, you poor love, hope you hear soon and feel better in the mean time sending (((((HUGS)))))




this is meant to make you at least smile, if it doesn’t i apologise, your self pitying sob reminded me of the scene from the life of brian when matthias, (the old man) is on his way to open the door to the roman soldiers “My eyes are dim. I cannot see… My legs are grey. My ears are gnarled. My eyes are old and bent”.

on a serious note, (i can do those as well, i don’t do capital letters but i can do serious notes!) i hope today has been a better one for you. and your story about the breaking the nose spasm certainly made me laugh

boo x

Thank you for the hugs Janet, and for the smiles boo. :slight_smile: Today was better, very tired but forced myself to walk to town - can’t become too housebound or I go crazy. Eyesight isn’t right yet, but its better-ish, less blurred but now with flashing dots… Love my old-lady walking stick. Was a real help in town and even just around the flat. Oh! And I have quit smoking. All this has made me realise I am not quite as immortal as I like to think. Anyway, going to try go back to sleep after the 3am bathroom wakeup call. (((hugs))) and best wishes to all <3 ~Fruitcake