Hi all I,m feeling very sorry for myself today,hubby going out to play golf, so he will be gone for most of the day, and my son going to London for the day with his mates, so home alone. All I can think about is sitting here in the same chair in the same room again.i know there is a lot of people worst off than me so shouldn’t mourn. But since leaving work don’t have anyone to call or invite over, in other words I actually don’t have any friends(I know sad cow) Maybe just the pills talking, so will find a film to watch(just hope I don’t fall down when trying to get to the toilet with my walker) thanks for listen to this poor old girl(53) but this b----- MS makes me feel 93. Have loads of bulbs to plant out in pots but can’t do that on my own, that’s half the problem I can’t do anything on my own anymore which I hate.Anyway sun out so have a good day all. All the best Deborah
Aww Deborah, so sorry to hear that your feeling low. I cant do much to make you feel any better but i can send you a <<>>. I know esactly how you feel, my lot seem to do this that & the other leaving me behind. Even if i do go with them, i am often left on a bench, waiting for them to return.
My youngest who is 9 came home yesterday with some homework to do over the Easter hols-English is to write a diary entry for 3 days that you did something fun. Well thats brill that is, we dont really do much as i get tired ect so its going to be difficult for him to do. He does go out alot bike riding with his dad so looks like there is going to be 3 places they will have to go. I wont be in his diary then.
Take care Deborah, hope you enjoy your film.
Lisa
Hi Deborah
I think what you are feeling is how we all feel from time to time, bloody ms has a lot to answer to, but I hope it makes you feel a little better to know that we understand.
Your bulbs will wait until you are not alone, better to be safe. Have you thought about having a care line for times when you are alone, that way if you did need help, you can get it quickly. Your local authority or ot to advice if you are interested.
Last night in bed, whilst I could not sleep (again) I had this wonderful idea about going through my wardrobe, but when I got up I am so tired it will have to wait another day. I seem to have fantastic ideas in bed, thinking I am superwoman, and when I wake reality hits, never mind.
Hope you watch a lovely film, that will help to pass the time, and be even better with a bar of choc!
Pam x
Hi Deborah, Pam is so right, we do all get those days…my way of dealing with it is to find something I enjoy about being in my own…in my case the peace and quiet and the lack of guilt that I always get when I watch my husband do all the chores that I used to do. I hope it helps to know that we do all understand. Thinking of you and wishing you a lovely day. Nina x Hi Pam…I turn into superwoman in my head too…the things I think I’m going to do the next day! Then what do I do…zero!! Nina x
Hi Deborah, we all understand love. We look at what we used to be like and it’s hard to fathom what’s happened to us. I actually feel lucky that I live on my own… I think it would be harder with a partner as I would feel guilty about stuff… like today for instance… 2pm in afternoon and in dressing gown and not even washed!!! Sink full of dishes. Just haven’t got the energy. I am trying to work on ‘acceptance’… it’s not easy… but I’m working on it… when I can manage to get myself in that state of mind it’s seems easier. Just accepting how it is now and not fighting it or feeling guilty about it. Anyway Deborah, please remember that your little gang on here know exactly how you feel… so in that sense you are not alone. We are all here with you. Sending love and hugs, Pat xx
Hi hun. I am just wondering if you would qualify for a carer. If so, a carer would be able to accompany you somewhere you`d like to go. Or perhaps to help you in the garden.
A few hours a week would make all the differene to how you feel.
I have this kind of help and it cheers me up no end. It is paid or by Direct Payments.
luv Polx
Hi Deborah
I too can relate to how you’re feeling. I lost many of my friends when I became ill. It felt worse as I had to stop working and I got on very well with the staff and patients I looked after. I lost the regular companionship and with reduced mobility I don’t go out as much. I live with my 16 year old daughter who is lovely but has her own interest.
I agree with what everyone said, it’s not uncommon to feel frustrated and alone but that’s what everyone here’s for, to help and reassure each other that they’re not alone. I know we still need to go through the grieving process, having lost our healthy bodies but like with any grief it still comes back every now and again to bite us on the bum.
I hope you have a nice film to watch and that you feel a bit better by the time your family come home. Do you have a hobby? I took up sewing and crafts and get a real sense of achievement when I finish a project and time rushes by while I’m pottering along and sorting things out as well as sewing. I think a hobby is a necessity, just remember that you don’t have to be good at something to enjoy it and the more you practice, the better you’ll get. Your local authority will offer all kinds of evening classes and cater for people with disabilities. I’ve just completed one and loved every aspect of it. They’re really affordable too.
Take care
Cath xx
Hi, I’m home alone all weekend first time since my symptoms have worsened, I am fortunate enough to still have some mobility, I’ve done some light housework otherwise sofa surfed all day with my 2 yorkies,Charlie & Lola, t.v is on but not following anything. I was looking forward to the peace and quiet and not having to’ scream clean up your mess’ or endlessly asking for help with laundry etc,
I am missing them already!
Like yourself Amazon Lady only friends are workmates and the dynamics have changed since my mobility has deteriorated & still off sick.
A Big Hug to you xxx a lot of good suggestions from the others, I need to think about some of these myself xxx
Hi, I’m home alone all weekend first time since my symptoms have worsened, I am fortunate enough to still have some mobility, I’ve done some light housework otherwise sofa surfed all day with my 2 yorkies,Charlie & Lola, t.v is on but not following anything. I was looking forward to the peace and quiet and not having to’ scream clean up your mess’ or endlessly asking for help with laundry etc,
I am missing them already!
Like yourself Amazon Lady only friends are workmates and the dynamics have changed since my mobility has deteriorated & still off sick.
A Big Hug to you xxx a lot of good suggestions from the others, I need to think about some of these myself xxx
Thank you all for your kind messages, they really help, just to know there are others out there that understand makes such a difference. There are days that I’m sure each and everyone of you feel down, and we all have different stages and issues with MS, but to be able to let out your feelings here on line,well to say it helps is an under statement. Yesterday I was feeling sorry for myself, but as a Mother and a Wife that could and did do everything, but now has to rely on my husband to wash,dress and help me do the smallest on things, it’s hard, but I have to be a bit selfish know and let someone care and look after me, but it’s so hard.yesterday watched the whole of “House of Cards” highly recommend it. But today’s another day, and the sun is shinning, thanks for listening, and all the hugs. Love and hugs back at you Deborah
So glad today is a tad better for you Deborah, you are so right…this little section of the forum is a lifeline. I’ve never felt I wanted to join the Herefordshire MS group but about a year ago I made a very good friend who also has MS…I can’t tell you how it’s improved my life…every one of us should have a good friend with MS! Enjoy your Sunday , hope you have sunshine like us here in Herefordshire. Nina x
Hi Deborah I was running so fast last night I actually overtook busses by running along the sides of them but as I was on the path side I had to miss the shop blinds. And I ran across roofs I can still see it all as clearnas day, Yep another dream last night where I was superman or something similar. Stuck here in the wheelchair reality aint as good as fiction but its tea time a good cuppa and two jammy dodgers sitting on the table plus my grandson has his eyes on the biccies I am off to protect them from invaders. BYYYEEE from here to infinty and beyond XXX Don