Cognitive changes

Caring for someone with MS
1

I hope you’re all doing ok considering all that’s going on.

I just wanted to come on here and ask your opinion/ advice on my mum. She’s had a diagnosis of PPMS for about 3 years now. It’s progressed slowly but fiercely and she’s only just walking unaided. Her cognitive changes are really affecting me to the point I have had to have therapy to deal with them. I grew up without a dad and little other family so I was always really close to her. She has become extremely selfish, lacks empathy, sympathy, and reason. She didn’t wish me a happy birthday last week and when I phoned her she laughed down the phone and called me insane. My sister smashed her head open on a glass vase this morning while helping mum off the floor when she fell and my mum ended up phoning me hysterically saying that she can’t wait for my sister to move out because the drive to the hospital my sister was upset about the massive 4inch deep wound across her forehead. She wasn’t worried at all about my sister waiting in A&E.

Of course, these things happen all the time but these examples were over the past 4 days. I’m really struggling as I feel like I’ve not only lost my mum, but she’s turned into someone that I really don’t like and someone who doesn’t care for me or my siblings.

She’s turned to spirituality for comfort, and I understand this, but from what she tells me about it, it isn’t helping the situation. She’s always saying ‘I don’t care about anybody but myself now’. but, of course, this affects her children.

I’m 27 now but she was my best friend so it’s really hard.

I just know this is going to get worse and I need to deal with the loss of my mum and help her where I can. It’s hard when she doesn’t want anything to do with me.

2

Hi, well what a to do indeed!

I`m so sorry you are dealing with all this.

Your mum may have more than MS…do you think there is a possibility of dementia, due to her change of personality?

I would have thought being a spiritual person means being kind and thoughtful to others.

Boudsx.

3

Hi, I thought I would have a little crack at responding to your post about your mum’s apparent character transformation after 3 years, that we know of, of PPMS. A couple of parts I was not quite clear on. Does your sister live with your mum? Is this a good arrangement and did your mum have to drive your sister to A & E? Apologies for asking. just need to be clear (it’s the ex social worker in me). Also when you phoned your Mum on your birthday had you to remind her? Why was she calling you insane? You say you are 27 but you don’t mention how old your mum is or whether she has had to stop work because of the illness. I am wondering if her bladder is affected much because she might be prone to infections which could dramatically alter her behaviour in quite bizarre ways. Maybe you have been a little alarmed by Boudica mentioning Dementia, I do not know - but I think it would be good if you could come back to us and talk it through some more then we can try to give some pointers that might help direct things forward positively. Whether it is in a private message or on here, please know we are here to try to help.