My mum is in her early seventies and has secondary progressive MS. She lives on her own and has lived in her house for nearly 40 years so it would be difficult for her emotionally to move. However, she has had a number of falls and deterioration over the last few weeks suggests she will need to consider living at least partly in a wheelchair. Her current house is not set up for wheelchair living as the doors are too narrow and the layout is not ideal. We do already have a stairlift installed.
Has anyone been through this and got any advice on living options and weighing up the various factors. Although adapting her house may seem better for her emotionally, it will be costly and very disruptive (almost prohibitively so due to months of building work). I wonder whether selling her house and moving her to somewhere more accessible/on one level that needs less adaptation work may be an option, or moving to one of the residential housing communities where they have emergency assistance. I just wondered if anyone had any experience of doing any of these and could impart some wisdom?
I know from my own mum, they can be stubborn as heck. You have to convince her that her quality of life will be as good, if not better. If she owns her own home, presumably she can afford to buy a bungalow. Start looking now. Never too soon. On the encouraging side, my in laws had lived in same home for 40 years, she never threw ANYTHING away. But when the son (my partner) moved out, they bought a bungalow. And now don’t regret it!
Hi, maybe a visit from an OT would help your mum make any decisions re should I go or should I stay? There`s a song there somewhere…I digress…apologies…
s are pretty good at seeing problems/solutions...had em a few times myself. Moving is such a big decision re costs, effort an emotions. So take advice from those who know whats possible re adaptations first.
Haha, yes absolutely stubborn, plus we both have the emotional attachment to the house so i am probably no help! I think a bungalow would be a good option, as long as it was somewhere she could be for some years, with some adaptations. Good to hear that your in-laws had no regrets Thank you
Yes, I spoke to the paramedics who came over when she fell the other evening, and they said they would refer her given she had three falls within a week. Plus I have asked mum to follow up with her GP. I agree that only an OT can really give us the answers/options. Unfortunately it is so hard not knowing how her MS will progress and therefore what adaptations are worth doing, and we are both such bad decision makers!! Thanks for your advice though, it’s lovely to know there are people who at least understand xx
OTs are known for
future proofing people`s homes. For instance, they wont advise the installation of a stairlift if they can see progression worsening to the point of needing a through floor lift.
That’s reassuring to know! I think mum is keen on downsizing as adapting her current place without a lot of work seems very daunting. However, hopefully an OT can help her think through options and we can figure out what is the most future proofed solution x
Boudicca - the Clash!
if i go it will be trouble, if i stay t will be trouble…