Gosh, well there is a good range of views - which brought out philosophical questions on autonomy, on ‘right to choose how you live your life’ and more interestingly how many of us can hit the English cultural wall - and slide down it - when we challenge the orthodoxy of ‘onward and upwards’ - and dare I say - ‘best foot forward’. So many, many thanks everyone. I will take all your comments on board.
I can see there might be some medical downsides I need to consider re circulation etc.,. I did do a bit of a zimmer walk up the corridor this morning - so I think I’ll keep that up in future.
Most of the cooking is done by either my husband or daughter - so I have help - but that’s more to do with dropping things, and weak hands. But I can make toast and tea and put soup in the microwave - so not totally useless or lazy. In fact it is just over the last 2 years that I have stopping doing housework and cooking for everyone. I even used to walk the dog up the lane - but I can’t do those things now. I’ve reached a turning point.
On JBK, Alison and Sue’s comments - no I am not ‘suffering from depression’ - the opposite actually - cheerfully trying to find a way to improve my quality of life. I’m looking for a positive solution, and thought this might be it.
I am on the same page as MrsJ, ‘as i could do less and less i adapted, i had to either do that or get depressed.’
Alison’s comments are encouraging and realistic, ‘Good for you, though, living life your own way.’ So, thank you for that - because as the years have passed, I’ve found myself becoming less of an autonomous individual - and more a ward of the NHS.
I find that its others, that cant cope with the fact that i DON’T get out much i don’t have much choice in the matter really,so its easier for people to think that i choose to live like this i don’t… but i will NOT let it get me down,i do get down every now and then like a lot with ms do,but i never get bored and i never crave company i have always liked my own company,good job i do.
That is a good point, Poll. I had drifted off into an ‘Anita Brookner novel’ fantasy world where everyone seems to be a lady of ‘ample private means’. Those three lovely words (not ones that have ever featured in my own world in that order or in the same sentence, alas) are strangely attractive to me. They do have a nice ring, don’t they? Oh dear, I seem to be wandering again into a dream world in which my well trained and discreet domestic staff (funded by my ‘ample private means’) go about their duties with quiet efficiency, meeting my every need…
I have no choice sometimes to stay in bed all day, everything just shuts down and stops working. However, I like to soon be up and about if I can. The worst is three days in bed but I do get up and cook, walk round the garden then get tired and go back to bed. However, erm if I had someone to snuggle up to it would be a very different story
Initially, I had a massive fear of having to ‘take to my bed’ for periods that my poor achey body demanded. Now, I have adjusted and when this happens, I make sure that I have lots of teabags in, books, magazines usually gardening, computer and all the tat I can find on the internet. Netflix, some facebook and searching on Youtube for loads of music old and new. I view it as quality time that over many years, I never really had time for. It took a real head-mess to think about the massive changes and come to a conclusion that that is just how it is. It is quite a solitary way to spend time but I do feel that for me, accepting was a big thing.
