Thank you

Primary progressive MS
1

As those who have read my posts, I wanted to know how I could try and help my Brother following his diagnosis of PPMS less than 2 years ago.

(I too have MS and was diagnosed in 1999 aged 21, however, and very guiltily, I have been living almost symptom free for 15+ years)

His job as a bricklayer had to change, and luckily the owner of the company did everything he could for him - but, when complaints were being made about ‘a disabled guy falling over on site’ he could no longer work. In June he had to give up working completely. I then set about the mind boggling task of applying for benefits for him - Jeez - what a nightmare that is… we were slowly starting to get somewhere with that, and he’d just started his 2nd course of antibiotics for a Urine infection from the catheter he had tried to use…

He was trying to maintain some kind of a social life, but the bowel and bladder incidents were becoming more frequent, his as were the falls, and the cocktail of meds was causing all sorts of issues, and thats without the inability to sleep and the spasms.

Thankfully, due to Covid, and me working from home, he would come to mine 3, sometimes 4 times a week and sit and chat (something he had never done) and chill out in my garden with a beer. Looking as though he didn’t have a care in the world.

Then on 15th August he took his life, age 39.

He told us all that he would, many times over the previous 3-4 months, and had messaged me 2 days previous asking me to tell him when enough was enough, and how much longer should he put up with this… I couldn’t tell him things would get better, but that I would continue to try and get him all the help I could.

We are all devastated, but managed to give him an amazing send off, and we have so far raised £2500 on his Just Giving page for the MS Society which is fantastic.

We will be continuing the fundraising, I was able to complete the Great North run in 2006, also for the MS Society.

Thank you to everyone who has previously offered words of advice, support and love to my previous posts, and I wish you all the best in living with this awful disease

1 Like
2

Howards87. I’m sorry for the loss of your brother. I can only imagine the sense of loss your family must feel.

I hope you can find some comfort in the fact that he chose to spend time in your company, chatting with you, which you say wasn’t usual.

I have contemplated how I would proceed with things if the time comes when my deterioration becomes such, that I no longer enjoy my life and do not want to be here anymore. In some strange, weird way, try to find solace in that he fully understood what he was doing and obviously had given it some considerable thought. He made a choice. Something this b@stard of a condition couldn’t take away from him. He has found his peace.

Life is just too sad, too hard, for some great people. Sending you strength and blessings. x

3

So sorry for your loss…I do remember your posts. Take comfort and strength that your brother is now at peace… And know he had the courage to take control of his life before he was completely lost to this illness. Remember him in the good times with love and happiness x

4

Oh sweetheart.

As I read halfway down your post, I saw problems like many relatives and friends have posted…but I just didnt expect what you said next…that your dear brother took his own life. I was so shocked and saddened for you.

I dont know what I can say to comfort you, except to say how sorry I am. MS is a total s’‘’ of a disease.

Take care lov.

Boudsxx

5

So sorry to hear your news. Anne x

6

So sorry to hear this sad news x

7

Oh I am so sorry to hear of your loss, take care.

Pam x