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Parrot joke, contains mildly rude nuts

There was this parrot, the owners decided he needed a mate as they would like some baby parrots.

As they couldn’t decided which was the male and which was the female, after watching them breed they promptly put a collar around the male parrot’s neck.

The next day a friend visited, he was the local vicar, the parrot took one look at him and said "I know what you’ve been up to, so they put a collar on you too!!!

Wendy x

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Corkie/anon - thanks for the jokes, well needed :-):slight_smile:

I like it anon, perhaps we should have a whole page of parrot jokes,

Wendy x

I love silly jokes like this. Reading them to my husband and literally crying with laughter…I’ve such a vivid imagination :slight_smile: I have this picture in my head of the poor parrot living in hope everyday for food :slight_smile:

Wendy’s joke reminds me of the naughty priest and parrot scene in Mrs Brown’s boys :slight_smile:

A man took his bird to the vet because it had been sick.

The vet said “I have good news and I have bad news. The bad news is, your bird has chirpees. The good news is, it’s tweetable”

Burglar breaks into a house; its pitch black only his torch lighting an area and all of a sudden he hears “Jesus will get you.” He carries on just thinking it’s his imagination and he hears again “Jesus will get you”

Aiming his torch around the room he finds a Parrot on a perch. “Did you say Jesus will get you “he asks the Parrot who replied “yes.”

“What’s your name” asks the burglar; “Moses” replied the Parrot. Laughing the burglar says “what type of person would call a Parrot Moses?” The Parrot replies “The same type that calls a Rottweiler Jesus.”

G

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Oh G, I really should have read this before I went for a wee lol very funny

A young magician started to work on cruise ship with his pet parrot. The parrot would always give away the tricks saying things like " he has a card up his sleeve" or “he has a dove in his pocket”

One day the ship sank and the magician and parrot found themselves alone on the lifeboat. For a couple of days, they just sat there looking at each other. Finally, the parrot broke the silence and said “Okay, I give up. What did you do with the ship?”

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All very funny thank you guys

Wendy x

Good one mate

And not a mention of you know who