The trouble is that MS often causes depression. This can lead a person to neglect their personal hygiene, gain weight, and to ‘let themselves go’.
I can’t see that taking your relative out for a ‘pamper day’ is the answer to such a situation. And being taken out to eat with badly fitting grubby clothes and unwashed hair isn’t going to be fun for anyone.
I’m not depressed, but the thought of a well meaning friend or relative suggesting I go out for such a pamper day fills me with horror. It’s not necessarily every woman’s idea of fun, and for someone who’s shown zero interest in her appearance just lately, I can’t imagine it being top of her list of priorities. Plus, it sounds exhausting in itself.
Jens reply, to find out the reason for her self neglect seems more apposite. Ie, is she capable of washing her hair or clothes? Does she normally take better care of her diet, hair, clothes? Is she clinically depressed? Should she be encouraged to see a doctor rather than a beautician? Or does she need assistance in getting social care help? If she is incapable of caring for herself, then perhaps she needs carers?
If your relative is able bodied but has neglected herself because of depression brought on by the diagnosis, I would expect she needs some kind of intervention in order to get her some medical help.
I think broaching the subject gently and carefully is a good idea. Ask her what the problems are. Find out what is causing the self neglect. Is she lonely and sees little point in washing, eating well and taking care of herself? Does she need help? Of a practical nature or a mental health perspective?
As a close relative, it sounds as if you are the only person who can lovingly broach these matters. And it may be that Crazy Chicks solution is in fact a good one. It really depends on what the cause of the neglect is and also on your relatives own personality and preferences.