I’m so sorry, I don’t know what comes next. It’s one of those situations where you know that a final end to his suffering would only be humane. But that doesn’t help you when it’s your father.
I don’t know you or your father, obviously, I can only imagine that visiting him, however much you love him, is heartbreaking every time.
Is he living at home? With your mother (or a partner)? How hard must life be for them. Have you talked to your fathers neurologist, MS nurse or carers about a prognosis? Do they have any expectations for the future?
As I said, I have no answers, but you have my sincere sympathy for you and your family’s pain. And he has my empathy for his.
He’s living at home but there is always someone taking care of him, either a nurse or a carer.
My mother is still living in the house, but she does not really share with me any detail on the situation.
I know the doctors have stopped with any treatment because there was no point in keep trying, they are just fighting infections as they come.
Thank you very much for your comment, it’s hard to talk about these things to people who don’t really understand the illness.
I honestly don’t know for how long his body can keep fighting. I don’t know if it’s a matter of weeks, months or if he can keep living like this for years.
everyones experience of MS and it’s end stages will be somewhat different.
i sent this same message below yesterday for someone asking the same kind of question.
Hi
I’m so sorry to hear of your situation.
I unfortunately lost my dad 3 months ago.
He had PPMS and COPD. He also suffered with UTIs and chest infections.
he spent his last 6 months predominantly in bed and had a number of hospital visits. He was essentially on end of life care with palliative nurses administering morphine for his pain. His doctor advised us that there was a limited amount of time left for him as his body was tired of all the fighting.
Although the hospital staff were beyond fantastic they struggled to care for him in terms of his MS needs.
In their defence he was in there to be treated for UTI / Sepsis.
He went in on a Sunday (blue lights and all) and he was really agitated and clearly wanted to go home. We made a family decision to take him home on the Thursday and give him his wish to pass away at home with his family.
He died on the Sunday.
I never knew how I would deal with the inevitable grief of losing my dad as we were a really close family but in truth, seeing his pain etched on his face subside at the end made it a lasting positive memory.
I should update that my father passed away in February, he got the flu and developed another chest infection. His body was to weak to fight and his heart stopped, he passed away in our home, when the ambulance arrived the paramedics could not do much. I knew it was about time and I spent the past few years wondering when it would happen and how. I was prepared for it and so was the rest of the family. At least now he is not suffering anymore. Thank you very much for your support.
I believe that it’s very important to be able to say a proper “Goodbye” to those people you have loved and have loved you.Luckily you were able to be there when your father passed away.
I expect that you now have an empty place in your heart and that it is the end of an era; which it is.
Thank you for thinking of us and letting us know. that was very thoughtful.