Just been to see my gp today, she’s really nice. I asked her to write me a statement because I’m applying for a change of circumstances to my DLA. I wrote a list last night of my symptoms/problems to take with me so I wouldn’t forget and left a copy with her. What I’m trying to get off my chest is this. When I was looking through the list it kinda upset me to read all the symptoms, I’m not sure why but it did. And another thing, if you saw me in the street you wouldnt know half the problems I’ve got…its not like a broken leg is it? Gp referred me to ot and physio…I’ve got this fear they’ll look at me and think, what you wasting our time for. I know its stupid…I’m a qualified nurse and I really should know better but today I feel vunerable. I promise I am a strong positive person normally. Anyone else ever feel like this? ( in case you dont know me, I was diagnosed with ms last month) x
Sorry about moaning…feel awful now. Just wish today I didnt have ms x
A few weeks ago I ran into a friend I had not seen for years at a professional conference - of course everyone was indulging in the free wine etc but I was not. I was explaining to her that I don’t really drink too much now because of my MS. She didn’t know I had it - although I’m 12 years and counting - and her comment was ‘Well you look fine to me. I’d never have realised’
We don’t have a big sign above our heads with flashing MS letters, your GP knows this as will the physio people etc so they will not think you are wasting their time. So don’t be apologetic about your condition. They are there to help you.
Take care hun
I’m not dx still in limbo waiting mri but know how you feel. I am a qualified nurse too and apologise if I go to see the gp and feel like a hypochondriac unless as you say its obvious like a broken bone so most symptoms I haven’t actually gone about. Huge hugs Axx
Yep, me too! Good days and bad… And I’m a nurse too, and don’t want to come across as overly anxious.
As far as not drinking wine, JellyBellyKelly (great name :-)), do you find you get drunker on less alcohol then? I certainly do - I used to be able to drink most people under the table, but now find I’m pretty drunk after a thimblefull…
Yes blue sky my hubby says I’m a cheap date now lol. Certainly never used to be I’m ashamed of the amount I could drink once Axx
Hi Blossom, I’m not diagnosed but I was reading through my year’s worth of symptom diary, looking for when a particular symptom began and yes, it is upsetting. I notice lots of little things that even those closest to me have no idea about. Blue Sky and Arwen - I never had a great alcohol tolerance anyway but its even less recently. My friend thought it hilarious on my last birthday just how fast I got the giggles. I go so silly! No need to drink at the moment though, I already seem tipsy! Who else can’t get through a post without using the delete key almost as much as the space bar?!
Fortunately/unfortunately a lot of the MS symptoms unless severe aren’t always visible. No-one can see the fatigue / pain / parastheisa/ hug/ optic neuritis/ bladder/ bowel issues.
So don’t worry - the physio will know and should understand.
Hi Blossom x feeling vulnerable is so very normal you know! As a nurse you are trained to deal with whatever is thrown at you - otherwise you would not be able to function x On a personal level it’s not so easy x Be kind to yourself xxxjenxxx
Thank you for your replies, I really appreciate them. I’m feeling much better. Had a good cry, slapped on a bit of lippy and went out with my daughter and some friends to the local spiritualist church. No alcohol though…I only have to sniff it and I’m dizzy Trouble with me is, I’m happier when helping and giving advice to people but when it comes to looking at myself it all goes pear shaped lol. I prefer to keep away from Doctors as much as possible…I’m allergic to them lol. Its just been one of those days that we all get. I had to give up my career in 2006 because of Psoriatic arthritis…now the ms. I try not to put too much on my husband because he has bipolar disorder and too much stress his not good for him…I’m supposed to be his carer for goodness sake. I have to say though, he his a lovely intelligent man and works really hard to look after himself. I have a lot of positives in my life and I’m grateful for that. Tomorrow Is another day…onward and upward
That`s right lass, onward and upward.
Interesting how many nurses on this site…you all take so much time and care looking after others, that taking care on no. 1 is more difficult to stomach!
I find more reward in trying to help others, rather than thinking about my own stuff. But the thanks I get here, are so invaluable and appreciated.
I`ve worsened a lot this year…a helluva lot and when I wrote it all down for my neuro earlier this month, reading it back upset me…we take each problem on as it happens and dont realise just how bad things have got, until it is written down in black and white…standing out like a neon sign!
Your diagnosis is still very new and it may take a while to settle fully in your mind. Take your time with it. Be good to yourself and NEVER beat yourself up if you`re having a bad day.
Hope you’re feeling better Blossom. It’s fine to offload here - I’ve just had a good rant on everyday living. I feel so lost and confused with it all at the minute; which drugs should I be taking, what supplements, should I change my diet, should I get a stick, is it normal/ok to get up after 8 hours sleep and then have two three hour naps?! I feel as if my head is going to explode with it sometimes. I think I need a holiday (but then that throws up all kinds of considerations)! It will definitely take time to settle into this new way of life - like you, pre ms I never went to the doctors. Now I’m never away! Take care and be kind to yourself xx
Hello Polly, thank you for your reply. According to my daughter whose staying with us at the moment…I’m back to my normal bossy self. Quite frankly I don’t know what she means I’m sorry things have got worse for you this year. I’ve read some of your previous post…you do have a lot of health problems. You are a very positive person though and I appreciate the down to earth, common sense things you have to say. Love & Light to you ps! lovely name Polly, thats my mums name x Hello Sunflower, I can identify with every thing you’ve written. I too am thinking about a stick, so I can feel confident going out on my own on my bad days. Feeling fatigued seems to be the norm, I’m always tired. I used to do all my housework in one day, not anymore, I do a little bit of cleaning and I’m exhausted. Thank you for writing, take care of yourself too I tell you what, this typing is hard work. The amount of correcting I have to do is ridiculous. Guaranteed when its posted it will still be wrong…still aint gonna worrry abart that