23rd November 2011(I was 15 years old): I was admitted to the hospital because of the blurring of my right eye. I recieved a course of methylprednisolone for 3 days. The doctor didn’t tell me what is this disease. She said that it is common in the middle east and it won’t effect me in the future. She also said if I felt the blurriness is back then I have to go to the hospital to do the check ups again. I had to take avonex for 1 month once weeekly.
2011-2013 : In these 2 years I didn’t go to the hospital for check ups or anything else because I thought I was fine. But on May 2013 I decided to go to my neurology doctor. She made me walk in a straight line but I couldn’t because of my imbalance and also asked me to do other things. She said that I have to be admitted to the hospital. She yelled at me for not coming to the hospital for 2 years and she said that my disease should be followed up. I don’t know what my disease called so how can I know if it is that serious.
31st May 2013: I wad admitted to the hospital and again I recieved a course of methylprednisolone for 5 days.This time I was admitted because of dizziness, imbalance and on-off blurred vision. The doctor told me she will explain to me about my disease on my next appointment.
5th June-23rd June: I looked at my hospital final report and searched about my disease. I found out that I was diagnosed with CIS. I read a lot about it on the internet and it said that it may turn to MS so I read about MS too. I was really scared and I cried whenever I read about it because I was scared if my disease(CIS) turned to MS.
24th June 2013: Today is my hospital appointment and my 17th birthday. The doctor didn’t tell me what is my disease she only told me to wear shoes always and to not wear a long dress. She wasn’t going to tell me what is my disease not even what it is called so I asked her. I told her if my disease is CIS but she said no it turned to MS. I didnt ask her anything else because I was shocked. She said that I have to take avonex for 4 months. She also said that the MRI result is just like before on 2011.
NOW: I carefully read my 2011 and 2013 final report and I realized that the doctor lied at me. She said that the MRI result is the same as before BUT in the report it said that the load of lesions increased comparing to previous MRI. She said that it is common in middle east but it is not! I just want to know why she didn’t tell me anything about my disease?? And why she lied at me?! Right now I am depressed and sad. My parents don’t know what is MS and how it will effect me. I don’t intend to tell them because I don’t want them to feel sad. I just want someone who tells me more about ms and how it will effect me. I also hope that someone will be willing to hear me and understand me.
PS; Thank you to everyone who read my story.