“Smoking kills. If you’re killed, you’ve lost a very important part of your life,” – Brooke Shields, during an interview to become spokesperson for federal anti-smoking campaign. “I’ve never had major knee surgery on any other part of my body,” – Winston Bennett, University of Kentucky basketball forward. “Half this game is ninety percent mental.” – Philadelphia Phillies manager, Danny Ozark “It isn’t pollution that’s harming the environment. It’s the impurities in our air and water that are doing it.” – Al Gore, Vice President “I love California. I practically grew up in Phoenix.” – Dan Quayle " It’s no exaggeration to say that the undecided could go one way or another" – George Bush, US President “I was provided with additional input that was radically different from the truth. I assisted in furthering that version,” – Colonel Oliver North, from his Iran-Contra testimony. “The word ’genius’ isn’t applicable in football. A genius is a guy like Norman Einstein,” – Joe Theisman, NFL football quarterback & sports analyst. “We don’t necessarily discriminate. We simply exclude certain types of people.” – Colonel Gerald Wellman, ROTC Instructor. “If we don’t succeed, we run the risk of failure.” – Bill Clinton, President “We are ready for an unforeseen event that may or may not occur.” – Al Gore, VP “Traditionally, most of Australia’s imports come from overseas.” – Keppel Enderbery “Your food stamps will be stopped effective March 1992 because we received notice that you passed away. May God bless you. You may reapply if there is a change in your circumstances.” – Department of Social Services, Greenville, South Carolina “If somebody has a bad heart, they can plug this jack in at night as they go to bed and it will monitor their heart throughout the night. And the next morning, when they wake up dead, there’ll be a record.” – Mark S. Fowler, FCC Chairman
Lol Roisin I thought I only said stupid things when my poor MS brain was having a brain fart lol xx
Excellent stuff.That was my 1st laugh of the day.Thanks.