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I think I need help

Hi. Had my first relapse 1 year ago. Since then half my personality seems to have disappeared. My only emotion seems to be laughter (technically not really an emotion I know…) Outwardly apparently I’m just the same, just a tad quieter. Inside it’s a nightmare. I can’t think, if I try to use my brain for anything it just goes into a spin. If I keep going I’m totally nauseous and incapable of much. The nausea was constant at first and gradually got less constant and intense.

I went back to work after a month, that was a hell I wasn’t prepared for but I eventually got to the stage where I could complete a full week at work. Could do some mentally taxing (for me) stuff but not a whole lot.

I had described these symptoms to my neuro and when asked he gave me a rough guide of a year for improvement. All good - so I did the above. I saw my neuro again before Christmas. Cutting a long story short, the interview ended with the neuro saying he couldn’t see any reason for my symptoms on my scans. It kinda ended there with a begrudging promise to see me in six months - he apparently wanted to sign me off.

So, my year of hell didn’t happen because my neuro didn’t see anything like that on my scans. I’m stressed anyway as I’m selling my house at the moment., But this has sent my stress through the roof. I literally cannot work cos of the nausea and cog issues. I’m just sitting here thinking that everyone thinks I’m making it all up. I also seem to have problems describing these issues which just adds to the craziness…

So angry as I was doing quite well up till Christmas. Now I’m a mess.

Oh yeah, I mentioned half my personality was missing. Well that seems to have come back around Christmas too. So I think my messy state is probably a combo of all the above.

Has anyone any experience of this? I thought it was ‘normal’ MS stuff until the neuro hit me with that statement.

Please help - if I’m overreacting please tell me as I have no clue.

you are still in the early stages of accepting your diagnosis.

severe fatigue and cognitive fog are making it worse.

talk to your gp and if he wants you to have sick leave, give him a big hug!

i had episodes of laughing quite hysterically but minutes later weeping.

i found out that this is “lability” and a certain part of the brain causes it.

therefore i suppose it depends on where your lesions are.

like you, i also lost parts of my personality but it has come back.

good luck with your house sale.

carole x

Thanks Carole, helps to know others have been in the same boat. My neurologist seems to think I was making it up and I was beginning to think he might be right!