Going too fast to take the corners


I’ve contributed to a few threads this year and I know that you’re all a fine bunch of people out there. Or what I call “my gang” or “my sort of people”. (Thank you, Miranda Hart, for the running gag).

But this is the first time I’ve created a thread about my own condition. And I need help.

I got up early this morning to get some “me” time and do some breathing exercises and a bit of Tai Chi. Everything was going splendidly until Gill (my wife, and all round Gold Medal Winner, see previous contributions) got up.

After struggling, with what seemed like insurmountably demands, I suddenly realised that I only have two gears. Top gear or neutral.

At rest; I am pleasant, charming , debonair, dashing and all round cute, This is what I call “normal”.

As soon as I have to cope with the demands of reality, I shift into fifth gear. Then I am hyperactive, manic, short fused and all round horrible. This is what I call my “monster”

And Gill (my wife, see above) gets it in the face. Every day. If you have ever seen a Formula 1 car trying to take a corner flat out, you’ll know what I mean.

Is this the medications or the MS?

Gill (my wife, see previous contributions), just vetted this post and she says it’s sane enough to send. (I have no idea, and no sense of proportion).



Good morning m’dear!

The ‘monster’ to which you refer, has often times been referred to hereabouts, as good old MS.

In my own case, my ‘monster’ is the lesser spotted HSP…a thrice or so, removed cousin of the aforesaid MS.

If I may be so bold as to suggest that in my own opinion, you Sir I imagine, are the type of fellow who would prefer to live life in the fastest lane possible, if it had not been for your uninvited ‘monster’ gate-crashing your life!

There, will that do you?

Highest regards,

Pollyanna, aka Boudica, for her pluck and feistiness!

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hi anthony

my default speed is extremely slow.

it wasn’t always this way but alas now i’m just a tortoise.

haha! i make myself laugh sometimes, sounding like the mock turtle out of alice in wonderland.

my husband is the opposite of me and now it has fallen to him to be the busy one.

good wishes to you

carole x

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An NHS psychologist drew a chart for me and others in the newly-dx MS beginners’ class. First she drew an x axis and a y axis and she called the y axis ‘stress levels’.

Next, she drew a horizontal line a third of the way up the y axis and labelled it ‘a normal person’s everyday stress level.’

Then she drew a parallel line higher up, two thirds of the way up the y axis and labelled it ‘an MSer’s everyday stress level’.

Then she drew another parallel line right at the top of the y axis and labelled it ‘breaking-point stress level’ - the level at which a person will (as I think you put it elsewhere) tend to go off like a hand-grenade in a dustbin.

Her point was that ‘normal’ people have way more emotional headroom between everyday stress and breaking point than we do - our headroom is chronically squeezed by having MS and its implications to put up with all day every day. So we tend (all other things being equal) to be less good at coping with life’s ups and downs and less good at taking them in our stride without turning them into an international incident. I also think (although she didn’t say this) that it can make us less good at distinguishing between big disasters and small ones, so running out of coffee or having to call someone out to repair the washing machine can feel like the end of the world. If we don’t watch ourselves.

Incidentally, I am just as convinced that being married to someone with MS has something of the same effect - I think our long-suffering spouses have their everyday stress levels permanently raised too, and with similar consequences, to some degree at least.




When we first met, I used to be told by my lovely husband to “slow down”. I don’t think he meant quite this much.

The problem is that we have to live with the monster inside us, our ever loving OHs have to live with the monster that so often is us.

And I for one, have a habit of letting the beast or the bich inside me out. And of course, it is usually aimed at my dearest husband. He’s fortunate enough to have to live with both nice, normal, funny, sensible me and unfortunate enough to live with the bitchy monster that I become. I don’t seem to have control of the ‘off’ switch.

Two sides of the same coin.

But, to answer your question, in my case it’s the MS not the medication.

I hope we’ve been kind and gentle enough for your first thread!


Boudica, Carole, Alison & Sue (sounds like a girl band),

I love you! Perhaps we should get together for a bitch-fest.

I’ll book a hotel room, take out the relevant insurance, hire some crockery & protective eyewear. I’ll bring the White Lightning/vodka/Sanatogen etc. you bring the cheesy wotsits and really let it rip for an hour. We could make it a monthly session, I’m sure Gill won’t mind me getting locked up in a room with four Baclofen crazed women once a month (bring you own … well, whatever it is that you normally bring to these doos).

By the way, Boudica, are you The Boudy that I used to hear so much about?

I’m going to have a lie down now.

Thank you,


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Twiglets and fine wine.

Sue x

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Hi Ant, Boudy? Sounds like Boudica and Boudy could be one and the same.

I have a complaint about your suggestion re us getting together once a month for a bitch fest…

you said for an hour

an hour`s not chuffing long enough for a proper shindig in wheelchairs!!!

Teks me that long to get out of bed!!!


ps I love being daft, dont you?

O.K. I’ll book us in for a weekend.

a. You complain a lot for an ancient Briton. Haven’t you got scythes attached to your wheels?

b. Who said anything about getting out of bed?

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Red or white?

To go with twiglets, probably a rather rough red!!

But honestly, I drink both. Some would say I drink anything!


Good luck with that.


Oh gosh, I love you guys

That psychologist that Alison saw knew what she was talking about, didn’t she!

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