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feeling a bit sad and wobbly

I’m now 50 the 21st of October the day after my 31st wedding anniversary i turned 50…Is it the menopause? or is it depression from this illness I feel so up and down…someone who should have known better made Molly, my autistic daughter cry and i feel so hurt and angry…I know i need to get a grip…I don’t always get it right with her, i don’t always understand her, I still make loads of mistakes, so why am i so unforgiving over friends …its so hard i scare myself with my lioness emotions… Then my little big girl Rosanna 24 who’s in the adult care home for disabled adults has just been on the phone she’s so vulnerable too…i just feel so helpless at times being disabled and needing a wheelchair …sorry I’m just having a sad angry moment…I feel like the next person who upsets them will get run over by me and Frazer and a very heavy wheelchair!

Michelle

Oh Michelle it’s no wonder you get so upset. You’re dealing with so much!

Are your periods still regular? Even if you’re not going through menopause you might be in peri menopause which is the phase before menopause. It can send the emotions wild. It would be worth having a chat with your GP.

I had an early menopause… started at 42… and it was tough. I went on HIV and it was SO much better. I was on it for about 10 years and then weaned off it without a problem. So it’s worth thinking about if your GP thinks it’s peri menopause. Anyway, discuss your options.

In the meantime, don’t be so hard on yourself. Of course you feel angry and upset if someone makes your daughter cry. We would like to protect our kids from anything that hurts them, and esp special needs kids. But of course you can’t. She is a much loved and cared for girl. That’s what’s important.

So give yourself a break, be gentle and kind to yourself, and have a chat with the GP.

Thinking of you,

Pat xx

Lol did you mean HRT pat, you put HIV

Michelle i felt just the same with my peri menopause, i feel much better now i have been through mine ,i was 54 when i finished having periods,but the 10 year before that i started being moody and weepy a lot of the time,and found things harder to cope with as i felt stressed a lot of the time,i couldnt go on HRT as i had multiple breast lumps.

i agree with Pat, you have lots to cope with,and you are bound to feel upset and angry when someone dares to upset your kids,i am just the same, i found ‘mindfullness for meditation’ relaxation cd helped me and still does.I also like Bachs rescue remedy when i feel stressed,and panicky.

J x

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Happy belated birthday too Michelle

Be kind to yourself Michelle you have loads of things to deal with, I’m sure I wouldn’t be as good at coping with it all as you obviously are.

Sending you positive thoughts, much admiration and loads of hugs.

Jan x

Thanks Pat,

I still get periods every month, but i will ask next time if its the peri menopause.

I hate the out of control feeling for years iv’ had to cope with Ben when his tourettes was very bad , thankfully its much better now. Molly is very loud at the moment shes quite bright and she just wants to be accepted, but she often behaves like a 2 year old in a 14 year olds body, I feel like i can’t protect her in the same way now i’m in a wheelchair, I could always intervene before when she got into trouble its so much harder now…sometimes its just easier to stay at home.

Sorry for the moan.

Michelle x

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Thanks Mrs J

I justfeel like my stress buckets too full.

Michelle x

Thanks Jan,

Its October half term week so my girls are off, but i’e just got a new carer and shes very good both Molly and Isabelle really love her.

Michlle x

Of course I meant HRT… not HIV! Dear oh dear… xx

Hi Michelle

Don’t beat yourself up, you have an awful lot to deal with, and you ARE doing a fantastic job, not so sure I would cope like you do.

Half term week now so take things easy, and don’t forget to great yourself.

((((Hugs))))

Pam x

Hi Michelle,

Im so sorry…you have so much to deal with but as the others say, don’t beat yourself up…you are doing a great job and I have nothing but admiration for you.

sending you cyber hugs, take care,

love Nina xx

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